It's late. Just got back from a Women's program at a Wesleyan church. Never been to one. It was cool. My cousin was performing and I wanted to see him. His mom is the one that passed away last night.(read my previous blog for background)
God is soooo good! Tonight I recognized how he has worked in my cousin's life. He got up to sing and said that this morning he wasn't God's friend. He was upset with God. His mom had been taken from him. But by this afternoon he and God are friends again. PRAISE GOD.
He started singing his song and in the middle of it just broke down. The words got to him. I witness the devastation that I fear so much. I looked at him bent over that pulpit crying over his mom and I just felt like my whole world would end like his must have.
Grief is so scary. It looked like he had a pain in him that he couldn't get out no matter how hard or how long he cried. Nothing would ease that pain. Nothing but God. And God did. He sure did.
When you worship God through your grief you'll reach out for depression but you never find it. You have a hope that most don't have because you understand death. Even in your darkness you see a light far out to look towards. You understand God's perfect plan to end this pain.
I saw devastation tonight and it scared me. But then I saw healing and I felt some relief. He'll be in pain for probably years to come but he's gonna hold God's hand through it so he'll make it.
By the end of the night I could see his lively spirit again in his eyes. He joked with me. Made ME laugh. Unbelievable.
That's what God can do.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
AMEN... I think after my father passed away in 2003 I learned to accept death. I wouldn't say I was completely mad at God when it happened, I just didn't understand why he let it happen. I prayed and prayed until one day I stopped crying and felt a peace in my heart. My father was always known to be a strong man but eventually he got ill and the Lord took him so that he could rest b/c I never remember my father resting, he was always working and working hard. That is the memory I have of my father not the one where he got sick and ended up in the hospital. Then when my grandma passed away this March, the same feeling came over me. We prayed so hard when she got sick and my grandma was a true follower to word of the Lord. But God took her away as well. I saw it with my own two eyes and even though inside she was probably terrified she had this calming look to her. She was ok to leave the earth and spend eternity with her Lord and Savior. I was so close to my grandma she was like a 2nd mother to me and I was her favorite so we had a bond. I didn't go hysterical as I imagined once before. It was quite the opposite. I was afraid b/c I would never see her face anymore at least not physically but I knew I would see her again. So I gently kissed her good bye and asked that God take care of her and that was it and she went. Thank you again for inviting me to that event, I really enjoyed it!
Post a Comment